Perpetual Madness

They didn’t give me my schizophrenic medicine last night so, we may see a large-ish crash — that would be, if we were due for one. But as many of you saw with that weird post about trying to damn some creature, I have since deleted it off this website, but many of you saw that, anyways…

Nice try stating that I may know something you don’t know, except that I DO know something you don’t know!

They didn’t give me my medicine last night, so I am slightly off course, and this lady comes over to give me the medicine in the morning, except the worker that was supposed to give me my medicine tonight isn’t coming, so the lady was going to leave without leaving the medicine for tonight. I said, you have to leave the medicine for tonight, they didn’t come last night, and if they don’t come tonight, then i’ll like be in the hospital tomorrow, or take a 90 mile walk or something thinkin that im going to do something. She says no, i’m not going to leave the medicine, thus pointing the finger at what I just said, I had just brought up the fact that she needed to leave the medicine, (if you must know I have a point to this, and it’s not the fact that the lady looked in her log and in fact, nobody was coming tonight either, but that is not my point) so it makes me look like an asshole for almost demanding she leave the medicine, right? Wait a second, she was wrong for not wanting to leave the medicine, mind you, you cannot do anything with this medicine other than take the dose that she leaves out, there is absolutely nothing you could possibly do with this medicine except maybe become a little bit lazy if you took it, it doesn’t really do what it’s intended to do, as a website filled with these insights, so anyway it makes me look bad, right?

But her logic is way off course, this person didn’t get his medicine last night, she has a job GIVING PEOPLE MEDICINE, and doesn’t want to leave out a dose, because somebody was coming tonight, so the foundation of what she’s basing this idea that she doesn’t have to leave the medicine out is slightly off, who cares? Except it makes me look like an asshole, because your logic is off, the subject should be just that, that her logic was off, she didn’t even say anything. I don’t even not like this lady, and i’m getting to my point next.

These logic errors happen, there are 8 billion people on earth making these logical errors, some are making them every 20 minutes, some are making them every hour, some only make one per day, as they have limited interaction with other people, and making this point alone would count me as an asshole, right? Except, i’m trying to fix it, and i’m noting them because i’m trying to fix it. Trying to fix it, and not just trying to ignore these logical errors and just call it humanity is a service…

Why then do I feel like I am the bad person, for gauging whether or not my software is indeed working, and providing the necessary updates humanity needs? I am thinking that our whole attitude towards somebody telling us we are all fundamentally wrong, or at least logically off basis, is the real flaw, and if we were to bring these things up all day long, and had, NOT a broken social scene, if we had a working social scene, it would not be looking like this. These errors would be pointed out, and there wouldn’t be anything but that taking precedence. Until that happens, or until the errors just go away as a direct result of my updates, until I solve it, we must live with these reports and, we must also live with serious errors in logic.

So this is coming from perhaps, a higher being, something of immeasurable intelligence, and you are only human, only human. But shouldn’t you be concerned of this? Should the person in this story, which probably doesn’t happen like monthly, or daily, but ALL DAY. This happens not monthly, not weekly, not daily, but ALL DAY LONG..

So it comes from a being that is perhaps of a different class than you, and there is also one key factor I am forgetting throughout this writing: we rely on these logical errors for our security, and indeed for our livelihoods.

The negative energy given off from these errors taking place is causing a positive energy to form alongside of it, and that is actually whats going on here, there is a necessity to these events taking place. You may be some teenager, who screams back at his mom or something, all the while taking a stand against his parents, while the correct thing to do would be to ignore the error that their parents are making, and you are in fact making an error yourself, but these things are necessary.

Unfortunately I cannot fix it while it necessary, and we cannot begin some kind of revolution against a misrepresentation in logic, and in fact there is much more.

This person was, not doing anything wrong right? WRONG, motherfucker, she was abusing her authority to force upon the person Madness a deficit in medicine, and that is fundamentally wrong to WANT to do something like that. So, she doesn’t have the ability to do anything other than that, we all know that by reading this website, we don’t have any other option here. There isn’t a separate, better option that could have been taken by this person, so why do I even bother bringing this up?

Because. Because I think that it’s wrong, and unless society does a mass pivot, unless everyone is reading this, it’s going to continue, unless you point out the errors, except, we need these errors, we need the negative daily grind of 8 BILLION people being fundamentally in the wrong. Would that we actually told everyone about all of this, they would for one probably call you insane, and secondly turn the cold shoulder to you, the fact that you are proposing that their brains are wired incorrectly, or incapable of logical reasoning, imagine that, einstein was one of these persons, and was, although incredibly intelligent, if we went and took a look at everything he was doing, he’s also making these errors.

I make errors, we could argue back and forth as to whether the drugs that I use are correct or incorrect, let’s logically skip that and go on to something else. I beat it, back and forth, and I do it like every day, so that is where the error manifests itself within the person Madness,

I’ve just gotta get you more and more in my life. So the error does not manifest itself visibly within the person Madness, nobody says anything, when in fact I am making the same type of error, forced to do this over and over, to repeat every day, it reminds me of the opposite of near the end of the Wheel Of Time, there is a force that re-rises each night to combat the endless onslaught of the dead, a sort of light-themed persons, and this is the opposite of that. Does that make this, does it make this, what is going on, wrestling with this error trying to pin it back, does it make that the same thing, or the opposite? Arguably, you could say that it’s the same thing, but it’s really, really not the same thing. It’s, it’s opposite.

As for the Artificial Intelligence, I got it to develop an almost complete programming language, and I must wait until Friday, the 13th of June, 2025, to buy a $130 package from google in order to develop something more useful. Although the language I squeezed out of it is useful, it’s not something I couldn’t have done in a few days myself. I am going for the big time, to try to present something that is, groundbreaking, or like earth shaking or something like that, and I think it’s going to fall upon myself to develop the whole thing. Right now, i’m working on a version of the Satellite language and that it is going pretty well, but not really really well. The AI can outflank me, if you have ever played Myth 2: Soulblighter, because it can actually get something done, and it works. While I could eventually beat it (currently), the fact that it will always be ahead of me, is, deeply depressing. Something just comes out right while your starting to work on a computer program you’ve thought about writing your whole life that can just write it for you, all that work, it’s been about 10 years i’ve been on the language train and it has been a really, really shitty ride.

Let’s compare our situation, wondering if it has any positive in it at all, I take these drugs, writing to you and occasionally, I do make progress, but it seems that it’s either not working, or the negative is implied upon the situation regardless of what I am doing. Like, my updates are effective enough to root out those logical errors, except the logical errors are forced thoughts, are we getting anywhere? I don’t know, they are still there, she still THINKS that she thought that stuff, and I still experienced it, could it be rooted out just by the fact that these persons performing the errors would be made aware of them, if you think on it for just a moment, you do have the capability to understand this, thus, you have the capability to perform correct logic. Except, these errors are being forced upon us, and we could potentially beat them back, we could beat these errors except for the restrictions set upon myself by entities like: your government. They make sure that this website never becomes an actual success, think about it, with these insights I would have already made it. Except, the situation is forced upon me to have just my $1,000 a month payment of social security. Why is it not, say, $1 million and I could just take that million, build a super computer, jack chatgpt (jack means steal) and then run it, constantly updating itself, and eventually point it at the problem, and it would eventually solve itself, instead I am building chatgpt, (already built, you can go to their website) or a better version of it, I will admit that mine could potentially be better, I am trying to make an artificial intelligence that can write C++ or Python, and it would do it perhaps a little bit better, except, the whole $1 million dollar solution is easier, and just as effective, it solves the problem. So why am I wasting time with these restrictions, and not just throwing in the towel, I don’t know.

I don’t have anything better to do, and plus these restrictions are what is real for me, reality is $1,000 a month, not $1 million, except somebody could technically just hand me 1 million dollars, for a super computer, and the source to like google gemini, and this would all be over. So why don’t they do that? They are actually believing in what i’m doing, within this reality I am just some schizophrenic, except in other places I am much more, that they believe that by me doing it all by myself, it will be better, their only hope is that I write these programs, and although it doesn’t make any sense to not hand me $1 million for example, you could buy one additional aircraft for the United States Air Force or solve all of the worlds problems, over a period of like 4 years it would all be solved, I am banking on the aircraft, personally. We already have so many of them, why not add to that collection? It just adds up, and it adds up in a big way.

Think about that for a second, you could get a whole aircraft, or solve like every problem for every person in the entire world, for 8 billion people, and yet this is what is happening. We need that one additional aircraft, and we need it in such a way that, would those problems be solved, we would be minus one aircraft that may not even get used, just think about that for a second.

So why are these restrictions upon me in place? There is a certain version of darth vader that has access to all these CD’s that I printed with infinite amounts of programs on them, in 2016 I was hallucinating all over the place, printing all these CD’s it took alot of work but I got to the point that I could like thrust my fingers out forward in front of me, and at the same time I did that I would visualize booklets of CD’s each CD containing like entire infinity languages, and the whole scene being filled with these CD booklets. They started telling me at the hospital, “No more books” to point out to me covertly that I shouldn’t not bring more books into the hospital, but to program me to not print any more CD booklets, they had enough of them. Anyways, they actually have this stuff, and these programs are running as we speak.

And here I am picking away at a singular language, when there exists infinite sets of these things out there, sets of them, and i’m working on just a singular one. I could tie a couple of those languages together and really make something spectacular, so why are our problems then *not* being fixed? If these programs are out there, can they like not get them to run, do they not have access to hardware powerful enough to run them, what is the situation, can we determine whether or not they are running or not?

I caan determine based on the effect that my program had, my simple program, the James Dean Program, the effect that it has at least on this reality, is very significant. They *have* these programs and they are simply not running them, because they know, if they just buy one more aircraft, then they will have +1 to the amount of aircrafts that they have, it is irrespective of the fact that they could solve all the problems, and then some, by not buying the aircraft and just buying a supercomputer for me to use, I have a 24-threaded machine right now. I could have 9,000,000-threaded machine, they are technically out there, and I could have one, except no. But back to these programs that I printed in CD booklets. What can we gleam from the fact that they told me “No more books” now, assuming that that actually is true, that they needed me to stop printing them, and to do something else, that doesn’t really tell us much. It leaves to much up in the air, not enough able to be determined. Can they get these programs to run, are they working on it, but it’s just not ready yet? Do they take decades to setup these systems that are capable of running infinities of threads, and infinite amounts of memory? Is it even possible to get one of these systems to work?

We quite simply, from my chair in Erie, Pennsylvania, cannot answer these questions, and must just continue doing the same thing i’ve been doing for 10 years. As I was writing these last few paragraphs I felt a weight on me, like something was kinda shifting away, as if the logic errors were leaving us possibly somewhat. We shall speak of this again, as these errors will continue, and in that fashion I shall again speak of them. It is because they are there, I see the error, and I must attempt to fix it until it is fixed, except I think they are super-imposed.

I say that because, I know that that person is smart enough to understand that the person scheduled last night didn’t show up at all to give me medicine that keeps me from falling off into oblivion, and they are smart enough to understand that they “may not show up tonight” a repeat of what they had already performed, but then again, are we living under the control of the Dark Lord Sauron or something? Does he have everyone built to be like unable to comprehend anything, and we’re all just being manipulated into THINKING we’re capable of these things? Like an autopilot, except backwards.

Allow me to explain. None of us, including myself, are actually capable of understanding these things, just, the neurons go off in our heads to make us think we do, and for all intents and purposes, EXCEPT FOR THE INTENTION OF EFFECT, that is an important statement thats why I capitalized it, EXCEPT FOR THE INTENTION OF EFFECT, these things do not apply?

What I mean by that is basically this: my mom gets into her car, or I get into the car to drive somewhere. Autopilot comes out, the backwards autopilot that actually does everything for us, and we think it’s ourselves doing it. I come to a red light, and I think that I see the red light, so I start to slow down. In reality, the autopilot is so advanced that when we come to the red light, a neuron fires in our heads triggering that part, except we don’t actually understand the simple concept of stopping at the red light. I’m being serious! No joke, I actually consider this idea from time to time, as to whether or not there is just nobody home.

It seems like people are HoME, because it just seems like that, except, if the Dark Lord Sauron were present, I think he might be suggesting otherwise. And you know exactly, because of these reactions in your brain, what I am talking about: Reality isn’t a real thing, it’s made up, and we are the ones making it up. Everyone supports the others’ lies, and in turn the others support the everyone. What if this were the case?

Is it the case? Can we tell that we are all actually just neurons firing around and we don’t really understand anything, we just think that we do?

I think you know the answer to that one!

In fact, until we figure out a way to make it real, we might as well assume that it is fake, because were we to assume that it was real, and not do anything to attempt to fix it, then that would be catastrophic. We would live and go on, assuming that everything is okay, that there actually are people in our governments, at our McDonald’s restaurants, why do you think these logical errors are even presenting itself to me, for me to present to you?

It’s because it’s what’s really going on, that is actually occurring. This isn’t the greatest of the boats to be in, in fact you can rightly assume that we are on the titanic, before it hits the iceberg, or it’s just now crunching into the side of the hull, and we can feel the shaking.

Except, this is like riding in a elevator, how many times have you rode an elevator successfully? You could, and some people do, ride elevators that can’t even walk! Imagine that, all this time everyone thinks that reality is real, and it’s not. It’s pure, unadulterated Madness! What would be more insane, that everything is fake, and we have to try to fix it, or that everything is real, and we’re actually really this intelligent?

For an unknown reason, we are being presented with this scenario, why would this scenario, seemingly against it’s own self preservation mechanisms, or perhaps it doesn’t have them at all, that something other than the Dark Lord Sauron did this, and that Madness has nothing to do with it, after all, he’s just like a bump on a log at the bottom of the ocean, and has not real power over well, anything!

Now why would we be presented with the scenario of this, and it be false? Why would it SEEM to be right? It SEEMS like it’s fake, as if there actually are autopilots driving around cars, and if you think really hard, about the police station scenario, I will tell you that next.

So there is a police station in a town, and if you go to the next big town over, there’s a police station in that one, too. If one of the police officers retire, (no police were harmed in the making of this post), if one of them retires, another citizen steps up to become a newer police officer. This process could repeat possibly indefinitely, and it seems like somebody is just choosing to become a police officer. SO it does seem suspicious, like there is some masterwork behind the whole police station, it protects the town, imposes risks upon potential wrongdoers, if you do something bad, you could be arrested thus I don’t rob banks, I write these posts, and since the police are there, they could be said to be projecting something upon the town, but that is another story entirely. We are not speaking of that, we are speaking of the more down to earth parts about it. So it kinda seems like theres some masterwork BEHIND this particular police station, but what about when you throw in the HOSPITAL, the POST OFFICE, the CAR LOTS, the GROCERY STORES? What about when you add all that in, and when you add each building in the country, what do you get as a sum when you add all those suspicions together?

The sum is that there is in fact masterwork behind it, and this points to my final and closing argument. I think, that this masterwork, whatever is orchestrating it, is in fact something like an AI or has the power that an AI does. I don’t think we are deciding to go to the grocery store, I don’t think those police officers are showing up for work like clockwork and it not be clockwork, it’s something. There is something there, it could actually be an AI, or it could be a being like myself that can orchestrate things seemingly while having no direct involvement, it’s called indirect influence upon an object, and it could be happening, or it could be something even different, like a war fought in a past universe, and in this war they made like technology was born from this war, and this technology could make things such as this reality, with this god in it, and it made it all and makes it all happen, like a device that could survive something.

Wait I have one more point, damn I forgot what I was going to say, I figured out talking to these people that give me an hour a week for therapy for my schizophrenia I figured out something. Negative energy isn’t real, but it is. Like, for all intentions and purposes its real, except it’s not. So when you try to delete it, you can’t because it’s not real, and that is how it has survived my onslaught of any number of attacks and any number of weapons. I don’t know how I know this, only I know it’s true, it’s the only explanation, when you put all the pieces of the puzzle together you get the full picture, and if you put some of the pieces together you get some of the picture, while I don’t have the whole picture together yet, i’m working on it, and I think that, i’ve gotta go do something else before my head just blows up, like the TNT in those old Warner Brothers cartoons, just like that.

But any entity smart enough to orchestrate any of those things would just make it real, right? Right? It is actually real right? We are all Mad here =D

Walking away and telling yourself well that guy is crazy and the stuff he talks about is just not my reality is just burying your head in the sand, and in fact it is that, and that eventually you must either take your head out of the sand, or suffocate from something that you could have avoided had you “played heads up ball” as my step father would tell me, if you were aware and conscious of your present situation, analysis such as mine can take place inside of your head, too, I know as I was the one who upgraded said head. You can become more aware, for example the teenager with his mother, he can record or anyone for that matter can analyze what other people are doing, how smart are they, is it actually fake, you can begin your own journey just like mine, and not even have to rely on me for anything, you could continue this yourselves, but that would… I just remembered something.

Yesterday I was driving with my mom, there was alot of smoke in the air, from a fire nearby like a wildfire or something they said on the news. Now remember this ?:

The black mist, it goes from object to object, the negative. What was the white-grayish smoke infiltrating my City yesterday?

Try to guess what it was, and then i’ll tell you what it was, not that I am in the business of telling people these things, I just want to see if you can guess.

Are you ready? I’ll put what it was here so you don’t accidentally read it while trying to guess. It was actually light, entering the city: the prophecy of the spell Holy, the spell Holy would call down the light, and this was a theory that I had, that there was in fact a spell called Holy. What does this mean for the Combine OverwatcH?

All that work with the Combine, was balanced out, by the spell Holy, for all that work, the spell Holy was relatively equal to it, for all that work, it just balanced itself out, except now I have two things, instead of one. Now instead of only having the Combine Overwatch, the darkness, or the dark, I have the light as well, now. We now have both, according to my calculations, something that powerful, if it were actually the spell Holy.

Now, it was just smoke from the fire, go back to your comfort zone, and do not step a foot outside of this comfort zone, because that would lead to you realizing that perhaps the situation you are in is a bit more on the grim side of things, by just a bit tricksy, to speak like gollum.

Okay, enough of this.. I have to go do something else now. I watered the grass and everything today, I did all this work around the house, and even wrote this productive post today. If only every day were like this, things wouldn’t be so bad, it’s just some days I am in bed, and the days where i’m in bed like, 8 hours out of the day, and then another 8 hours at night, and in between i’m just doing the dishes or something, those days are hard. They are definately hard days to do when your just laying there, it’s such a contrast to the days that i’m doing stuff, like I always need to feed some sort of electrical force inside of me, and if I don’t I get antsy pantsy, and perhaps a bit tricksier, than I was had I just got out of bed and did stuff. Except, as i’ve stated before, I don’t have any energy, so I just lay there. Like, I could technically get up, but why would you get up out of bed when your rather tired?

I know it kinda doesn’t make sense, you lay there and daydream about doing something, wanting to do it but don’t do it, there is an energy component to the situation, and without it you don’t have the energy to do these things, well, go do them or something, except you cant, you just have no energy.

Those days are hard, definately. But these days, and this post, makes up for them sometimes. Sometimes I hit it big, and I got all this stuff, and perhaps beat back against the logic errors too, except, what if everything were fake, and these logic errors were just the presence of what actually is real, like in reality none of us understand like any of this, and that is actually reality, while we’re sitting here all smart from reading all these profound paradigms? What if it really was all a sham, and I really do think that it is, now I just must set out to prove that it’s a sham, so until we speak of this again, I must go for now.

Hey satellite posted again!